C1: Difficult conversations and trust repair
Use when: Tension is high and you need to get to the real issue.
The questions
- Can we agree on the outcome we both want from this conversation?
- What feels most important for you to be understood about your perspective?
- What do you think I might be misunderstanding right now?
- When did this start feeling hard, and what was happening around that time?
- What do you need from me in this moment: a fix, support, or simply to be heard?
- When X happened, I observed Y, and the impact was Z. What was your intent?
- What would make it easier or safer to raise concerns earlier next time?
- What would repairing trust look like in specific behaviors on both sides?
- What follow-up would feel fair, and how will we know things are improving?
Research basis
Edmondson 1999; Gallo 2024; Schein 2013; Center for Creative Leadership 2025
Get the full field guide
The complete PDF covers 24 situations, 153 questions, and the four listening moves (reflect, summarize, validate, clarify). Download The Questions Leaders Ask field guide.
Workshop
Want your leaders practicing these out loud, with their team in the room? See how Kestryl Edge workshops work.